How some daily routines may contribute to divorce

By Goodwin Como, P.C.

In a world where people are conditioned to getting what they want as quickly as possible, divorce is often a promised land panic-button. Seeking an exit is understandable when you imagine a better life after declaring divorce. Marriage undeniably tests the foundation of your compatibility and sincerity to a lifetime commitment.

The precursor to a failing marriage sometimes results from the many daily routines and habits engaged moment-by-moment. Without realizing it, you may wake up one day to see how far you and your spouse have drifted from the connection you once had.

Here are some lifestyle habits that may be contributing to a damaged marriage.

Consistent lack of sleep – If you are not getting enough quality sleep each night, your irritability will increase. Sleep deprivation makes you more reactive and less able to think and reason clearly. You are prone to damaging outbursts and possibly saying things that are hard to take back.

Not managing stress well – When you don’t know how to manage your stress, it will manage you. Stress in marriage will come but how you manage it will make the difference. Consider managing it in a healthy way that doesn’t involve hours of watching television, porn or being on the computer. Other harmful ways of numbing stress is through excessive drinking and overeating.

Stress is best handled through exercise, healthy eating, quality communication with your spouse and involvement in a spiritual practice.

Dysfunctional work schedules – Graveyard shifts, on-call work, changing shifts from week-to-week and frequent business trips can all accumulate to the breakdown of your marriage. Your spouse may endure it in the beginning, but problems can easily arise when nothing changes.

Out of sync lifestyles – Perhaps when you met your spouse, you were both prone to late night overeating and junk food runs. But at some time during your marriage you’ve changed your lifestyle and have begun to lose weight and adopt healthier patterns. Whenever you are making major changes like this and your spouse is not on the same page, you could feel isolated and want out of the marriage all together. You and your spouse no longer share the same values anymore. Which makes your union feel incompatible if your spouse is unwilling to change.

Couples considering divorce may look at these daily habits and lifestyles. It could be that taking a clear analysis of the daily routines and patterns may help. When both people are willing to try their hardest at making things work, then there is hope. Divorce doesn’t always have to be the first button pressed to escape a difficult situation.